some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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