You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Randomize
