But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
