What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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