Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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