I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize