Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
wow bdsm is so cute
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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