i was born a porn star she said
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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