My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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