I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
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