Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
