so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
