Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
