she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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