Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
