There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Randomize