I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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