hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
