when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
