Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
