he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
