Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize