Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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