White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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