Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
You may now shotgun with the bride
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
