so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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