Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize
