kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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