You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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