HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
