I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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