Ambien. No doubt about it.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize