Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Randomize
