His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Randomize
