I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Randomize
