Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
