just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Randomize
