we're blogging at a bar
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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