Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize