Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I'm at about main and main street
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
