So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
