I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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