ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Randomize
