My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
