He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
