Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
We have so much sex to catch up on
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
