Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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