drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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