Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Randomize