i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
