You can't special order awesome
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize